Archive for May 3rd, 2007


storytime with the bro

May 3, 2007

Hey dudes, tomorrow is a pretty important day out there in the real world and I am gonna tell you all about it.  Around 26 years ago, there was a freakishly large headed baby born to two pseudo hippy Mennonite parents in the little town of Millersville, PA.  He was a good baby and grew into a strange little boy who liked mustard above everything else (in fact his younger sister was known to accuse him of smelling like the stuff). 

He also liked books and school, even though he didn’t always like the people he went to school with.  One of his favorite books was Encyclopedia Brown, but because he did more reading than he did talking, he thought the book was called En-clop-eh-dia Brown.  This was of course quite funny, and his younger sister continues to tease him about this.  Obviously this tow-headed little boy was joined eventually by a bossy red-headed girl and a round faced crawling machine.  Now it would be nice to say that they had many happy adventures together and that is true, but see the bossy red-head and the tow-headed boy didn’t always get along.  In fact sometimes they would put the crawling machine in the middle of the room and make him choose who he wanted to play with.  This of course will probably result in the crawling machine (who is now known as the crazy climbing machine) needing years of therapy. 

Eventually the red-head (who eventually became a tow-head) and the tow-head began to become better friends, this occurred during the required 15 minute one way commutes to school they had to endure together during high school.  Also the bossy girl learned that apparently the tow-headed boy (who is now going slightly bald) was cool after all.  He wrote poetry that won very important contests, had lots of friends (in fact his friends liked him so much they painted a mural of him in the art room, this impressed the bossy girl).  The tow-headed boy quickly graduated from high school and did all kinds of other exciting things, like travel to Cuba, Hebron, Columbia, and lots of protests.  The bossy girl also did fun things like travel to Africa and Germany and made friends that were boys. 

This all led into the phase of their lives called, being friends.  So far it has worked out rather well for them and the bossy girl even made the very important ring that the tow-headed boy gave to his girlfriend.  Now they live close by each other in the big city of Chicago and sometimes they play racquetball.  And the bossy girl even lets the tow-headed boy win all the time because she doesn’t want to hurt his feelings.

Happy Birthday Older Brother!